Christmas Day

This was actually written on Christmas Day and saved until I could get back on the net as I've been down the PILs.

Dec 25, 2007

So Christmas Day has just ended. It's kind of been a tough one because I would have been eight weeks pregnant today and was hoping to show of my small bump. The only other thing that has made it tough is that the MIL has these two beautiful modern angel decorations, absolutely beautiful, but she doesn't remember where she got them from and I suppose part of me and Mark was hinting for her to offer them to us. The reason why is because they reminded me of Alicia. I had made my mind up that I would get a single decoration at Christmas for her and every time I looked at these two angels, who were hanging on the fireplace in the living room; it just instantly reminded me of Alicia. Maybe I will be able to hint enough by the time we head back home.

Overall it was a pleasant day, I kind of missed being alone with Mark but at the same time I enjoyed the Christmas company. It's strange because I feel somewhat ready to try again, for a baby that is. Not religiously but the doctor said to try after two cycles so what I thought was to wait 'til cycle one is over and then go back on to the folic acid for thee whole of cycle two and then what will be will be.

Time is a healer, there are still days I'm going to be sad or angry but it's all a case of moving forward and that is what I hope to do in the New Year. Move forward.